As I write this I've been through a lot. Military, high level sport, I've become a husband and father, and none of those things are more important on my journey than this.
Becoming myself.
What do I mean?
So I'm really clearly understanding now that us men (and humans) pretty much HAVE to become something other than ourselves at the beginning.
When you think about it, we are kids who need some sort of behaviour to repeat. And that shapes SO much of who we are into adulthood.
But that's not WHAT we are.
We are energy.
Like the blank canvas you use to paint on.
Rub your hands together really fast for two minutes and you'll feel that energy that's controlling all of our perspective, choices, and actions.
Highest energy wins.
Before we begin our imprint period as children there's just nothing there in our head.
Except one thing.
Some people call it our soul, psychologists call it temperament.
It's that intangible thing that only we know makes us unique and authentic, it's when we act without thinking.
There's no sense of effort, time, or yourself.
In that moment you have overcome the biggest challenge.
Who you think you're supposed to be in order to have the love, acknowledgement and attention of your family, friends and, well actually, complete strangers really.
THAT'S when you give yourself permission to get the freedom you want. THAT is what stops you. You won't go against what the family approved of, and if they didn't have that total freedom, you'll unconsciously judge it as being bad if you get it, unless you free yourself by becoming you again.
Most of us fear what total strangers think about us.
It's actually part of why I'm writing this.
Because your challenge as a man, should you choose to accept it, is to become fully yourself.
Maybe that sounds stupid.
Or easy.
Well if you look at all psychological models of development, they point to one thing that is at the top.
Authenticity.
That's your superpower.
Because authenticity means
Doing what you want to do with or without fear.
You take the action because you know NOT doing it means you're not being YOU.
And you've crossed the threshold to being you and there's no going back.
This requires immense pain.
Psychologically.
Emotionally.
But it's the best thing I've ever done.
I'm not saying I don't still have challenges.
I do.
But my level of compassion for myself and others.
Even when they, or I am at my worst?
Is HUGE.
This allows me to move forward at a rapid rate.
To take massive action
Even in chaos.
So here's a list of how you become yourself that I have been through and am still navigating:
Seek mentorship - I've invested over $100,000 in mentoring to transform my beliefs, feelings, communication, relationships, business, body and leadership. I manifested my dream business, marriage and lifestyle by the beach. I dreamed of this, journaled it so many times, but still couldn't have imagined how perfect this reality would be. I am now one hundred percent content with my life, but I know I could be and do way more than I am, which is why I mentor other people to find that level of fulfilment so that they can achieve even more, without feeling stressed, anxious or unhappy like somethings missing.
I faced childhood unresolved experiences. My sexual insecurity and desperate need for intimacy with another woman was blocking me from finding my dream woman whom I trust more than I ever thought I could. I have told her things I thought I'd never tell anyone. My self sabotage patterns that led me to make a lot of money, and then lose it because of my inability to address the stress underneath the surface of all my actions. Many people were negatively affected because of this, those I cared about most, but this handed me my greatest lessons.
I learned how to become a masterful communicator. Again, this doesn't mean I communicate perfectly, and my writing still needs improvement, BUT.. My ability to have uncomfortable conversations has excelled. My personal and professional relationships are deeply fulfilling and a lot of people trust me with their deep dark secrets because I learned how to build trust so that I could enhance connection even more.
I discovered my purpose and implemented it. I created something that gives back as a vehicle for impact and income. I made many mistakes, lost tens of thousands because of my self sabotage I hadn't yet addressed thanks to my unconscious behaviours and fears running the show, but now can happily say I'm in the best business and financial position Ive ever been in. These are the key components of what has developed my deep appreciation for life, and fearless acts of being myself even when people closest to me (or far) have judged me for simply being myself. I've still spoken up. I want your dream life for you too. That's what we'll be doing in "The Masterful Communicators" Men's Mastermind for high achievers. The world NEEDS the leadership your authenticity brings.
We will work together from now and for the year of 2023. You will be challenged to stretch, grow and GIVE more than you ever have. You will be guided to become the best version of yourself.
There is huge opportunity for the first 10 men to join this training. If this calls you as a man, click HERE and type "SELF MASTERY"in a message to me.
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