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Daddy you’re scaring me

She wouldn't sit in the child's seat, I was holding my 8 month old son in one hand and trying to get her seatbelt on with the other.


We had cars all around us and I was beginning to get irritated.


I closed the door and said "wait there".


Walked around the other side to put my son in his seat.


As I did that I looked up and she's opened the door to walk around the back.


Now I was annoyed because we were near cars, and she didn't listen.


"OK.

LETS GO.

GET IN THE SEAT NOW OR I'LL PUT YOU IN.


I bellowed aggressively.


"Daddy you're scaring me"


She said as she climbed up into her seat.


I instantly felt deflated.


One of the people I care about the most in this world I just scared.


Someone is literally die for.


My point of this story isn't so much about what happened, but why?


Why did I react?


How do others behaviour reflect our own?


Maybe my need for control over her was being reflected by her need for control over herself.


After all toddlers crave control when there's so much they don't yet know how to do and require help with.


When we're acting out of fear, we can seek to control others.


I believe it's really where the most corrupt leaders in this world stem from.


The ones lacking compassion, are lacking compassion for themselves and their history of helplessness when they were at an age they couldn't help themselves.


My point is this:


Leadership of others reflects leadership of self.


I had an opportunity to act out of fear or faith.


Fear of the worst causing my words and actions


Or faith in my honesty and authenticity to know the words to say like "I'm worried you'll get hit by a car so please stay in the car. I've been a bit stressed this afternoon and I need your help."


I've seen the response when I do this before.


Even if there's not complete cooperation, there is deeper trust.


because I'm leading myself with honesty, the truth behind the fear (that is always acceptance and love waiting)


Because I'm leading self, others lead themselves better too.


What's some truth you need to find behind your fear?


Watch the world around you change as it reflects more acceptance back to you.


As we were driving home, I said


"hey honey"


"Yeah?"


"I'm sorry I scared you".


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